Burn-Out?

 

Will life not be the same anymore (?)

I am writing this hoping that I will feel better in some ways. I haven't been here in such a long time. I kinda miss writing and sharing my thoughts here.

A lot of thing happened. It changes people. Recently, I don't feel happy anymore with the things that I used to be happy about. I loved volunteering so much but now, i don't really know.

Some of you guys might not know that I volunteered at PPV (Pusat Pemberian Vaksin) for the past few weeks. Being an extrovert myself, I am really happy to be with other people and connect with a lot of new people, socialise, things like that up until one moment.. I felt.. numb. 

It drained a lot of my energy like a lott. For the past few days, I went there like any normal day I went to PPV just for the sake of my duty that I need to be there. Is this normal to feel numb and not feeling excited anymore doing things that I used to love? Is this how my life gonna be after this? Go to work for the sake of responsibility and duty. Not because I love doing it? It worries me. 

Is this what is called burn out? 

Dealing with thousands of people in a day really really really drains my social energy to its core sampai kecut dah. just like how those dementor sucks out the happiness in you. i'm not even joking. yesterday, at 10am pun dah penat gila and i am sooo sooo drained out. I really just want it all to be over real quick. fuhh. with all those drama. thousands clients mean thousands type of people to deal with. such a nightmare. hahaha.

All in all, I was grateful to have a wonderful team with me. Surviving those drama together. Alhamdulillah. They were so great and really nice. It was one of the great moments and experiences I got. I really hope all those experiences will help me to become a great doctor one day. To be more empathy towards my future patient, insya-Allah. Aminn.

life update as a medical students : i am currently still in year 4 of my study or i could say year 4 pro max as our junior already enter year 4 at this moment. funny enough I still haven't sit on any clinical exams yett which is why we still stuck here in year 4. dumb. inexperience. immature. regarding all those clinical knowledges and stuffs. jokes on us. Lol

That's all from me now. xoxo

Make it till you make it. Byee.